The Big Bad Little Red Riding Hood

Ok, you think Little Red Riding Hood is the sweetest little girl and the wolf is just a big blobbidy mouth, but here's my view of the story...the wolf's view.

Ok, Little Red Riding Hood was walking in the woods. Then she stopped. She didn't want to go to her granny's house. She wanted to bungie jump. She meets me, the wolf, and has the nerve to ask me...."Can you take this basket to my grandma? I want to bungie jump. I don't want to go to my grandma's house, cause she's ugly." See, she is not nice!

Well, she's bungie jumping, bungie jumping, bungie jumping and then while she's jumping, she dies cause she falls down onto the ground. So, I gobble her up because you can't just waste food. That's pooey. So, I had to eat her. I'm a wolf! What do you think? Wolves are supposed to eat vegetables?

So now I have this basket and I need to bring it to granny. I knock on her door, but then a hunter sees me and assumes I'm the big bad wolf, out of the three little pigs, but I'm a different wolf. He tries to shoot me, but instead he shoots granny and now granny is dead. So, then I had to eat her up, cause you can't just waste food. The hunter gets to the house, knocks on the door, then the door is open, so then he comes in, gets his gun and hits me in the head. And I'm like, "What did you do that for?" Then I'm knocked out. He cuts me open. Granny and Little Red Riding Hood, got out, but they were dead already. So I had to have a lots and lots and lots and lots of stitches. I was in the hospital for like 2000 years all because of a ratty kid I met in the woods.

So I hope this clears this story that I am innocent! The problem in the story is that Little Red Riding Hood is bad, not me.